Col 3:10 — having sunk into [enduo] the new self who is [anakaino] new from above (heaven) into intimate knowing according to the image of the One who created him.
The pronoun him refers to the new creation, the new person…. The new birth is a new creation in God’s image.
(12) Sink into, as the holy and beloved chosen of God, compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; (13) bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also can you forgive.
We can forgive others just as Christ has forgiven us. Don’t hold on to someone’s sin when they sin against us; forgive them like Christ has forgiven us.
Eph 4:31 — All bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be lifted [aor., imper., pas.] from you, along with all malice. How? (32) Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
If we don’t forgive others as we have been forgiven, then bitterness won’t be lifted from us and —
Heb 12:15 — a root of bitterness can develop and trouble [you] and defile (contaminate) many.
Unforgiveness causes bitterness and a root of bitterness breeds: anger, wrath, complaining, slander and malice (desire to see another suffer).
If we stay unoffendable by forgiving as we have been forgiven then bitterness will never take root.
We can stay unoffendable if we will walk in agape love &mdasah;
Eph 5:1 &mdasah; Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; (2) and walk in agape love, just as Christ also agape loved you.
1 Cor 13:4 — Agape Love…(5)…does not logidzomai, i.e. take into account or keep a record of kakos, i.e. evil, iniquity, wrongs.
We can be imitators of God and walk in love by not keeping a record of wrongs, by not counting peoples sins against them, just as God doesn’t count our sins against us, or keep a record of our wrongs.
Example: 2 Tim 4:16 — [Paul said] At my first defense (probably a trial before the emperor) no one supported me, but all deserted me; may it not be counted against them.
Rather than being offended Paul did not take into account a wrong suffered.
Matthew 24:10-12 — [Jesus tells us that in the last days] "many will be offended (count someone’s sin against them and not forgive them) and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another (we betray and hate one another, because we hold sins against one another) and because iniquity shall increase (because of being offended) the love of many shall wax cold."
If we are offended love will wax cold, because agape love does not take into account a wrong suffered — it is unoffendable.
It is not to say we won’t get hurt, but if we will not hold on to what caused the offense against the person, we can speak the truth in love, rather than in offense and repair the relationship and heal the hurt.
Phi 1:9 — I pray, that your [agape] love ( which is unoffendable) may increase still more and more in intimate knowing and all discernment, (10) so that you may discern [dokimadzo ] the things that diapherō differ, (potential offenses) in order to be sincere and unoffendable until the day of Christ; (11) having been filled with the fruit of righteousness which comes through Jesus Christ, (a fruit of righteousness is being unoffendable, because we are righteous conscious not sin conscious).
Harboring an offense feels good to the flesh because we are looking for revenge. We may mentally plot to get back at someone who has offended us. Evidence that we have let go of the offense is that we are no longer seeking revenge. We want healing or justice but not revenge.
We seek healing and or justice through agape love not in offense.
Act 24:16 — [Paul said] I train myself to always have an unoffendable conscience toward God and people.
We can train ourselves to have an unoffendable conscience toward people.
Practice releasing people from sins and trespasses.
God has already pardoned them from and we can train our conscience to be unoffendable.
Then approach them in agape love not in offense.
Agape love does not take into account a wrong suffered — it is unoffendable.